A Testimony about a lost girl that found herself in God
*Now Living in her PURPOSE*
When Philicia was younger, all she knew was the feeling of having to be perfect she did everything she loved and was great at it. She could not wait until it was time to go to college she had a dream college and plans of going off to college an HBCU to be exact, but her family kept her in Kansas City because of financial reasons and an older brother who went away to college, and it did not work out. From that, her parents said that she could not go out of town for school, and could not have a car for school and kept her in what felt like a box to make sure there was no room for her to mess up. Once she reached college, perfection was something she had pressure to uphold. She was living her life in the eyes of other people’s approval, but that was not her reality.
Despite all the anger that she felt going to a University that she did not want to go to Philicia still managed to have a good freshman year, so she thought, but that is what started to set up her downward spiral. From her grades dropping and getting into what she called a situationship with a guy that she would have never expected although the guy did not have bad intentions it was evident that they both had some growing up to do. Philicia started to put her all into this guy, and in return, she got nothing, and there she was again losing more of whom she was intended to be.
Fast forward to her Sophomore year she decided she was going to prove people wrong she was not this perfect girl and started to do things that weren’t like her because of the stress of trying to be perfect. Being raised to be strong and what seemed emotionless, she became heartless against people. She had lost her identity and wanted to find herself in other people, by going from relationship to relationship, whether that be friendships or relationships with a guy, she felt as though people could be cut off before they were cut on, not to mention a drinking habit that she had created. She was masking the pain holding so much on her plate especially family issues. She was just a broken girl with issues.
She found herself in the wrong major in school and was scared to figure out what to do because in the back of her head all she could think about was what other people would say. Law school is all she talked about and thought she wanted to do with her life. BUT GOD…..
She met a friend named Aryn, and now her sister in Christ, who also had gotten off track, and that started to draw them closer to God she decided that she would seek him to answer what she needed to do with her life. She then found herself in love with Christ and found her identity through him once she gained a relationship with God she then started to live her life through his eyes and for him. All the questions she had been seeking were now clear, and her life has transformed, God mended her heart and hurt.
God put it on her heart that it is meant for her to go into Higher Education and she was going to be the voice of her students. Even though she was scared of what other people would think, she listened to God’s still small voice and moved when he told her to. God showed up big he gave her the resources she needed and connected her with influential and God fearing women that are now her mentors and been there for her in ways that she did not feel she had before.
Philicia no longer drinks and is living life to the fullest as a single and celibate woman living life for God and is moving in her purpose.
"Don't lose yourself wanting or trying to live a fantasy life. Be okay with who you are and where you are in life. Struggles and failure may come your way but know that God is your source."
Question of the Day?
Who is painting the portrait of your life? Are you trying to please others and feel like the weight of your family and world is on your shoulders?